Ducati Takes Hipster Bait Too Far

Scrambler Café Racer video just hurts my eyes

I love café racers and I love scramblers. Of course I do. I am the twenty-something moto-centric hipster that they are advertising to, and for the most part, they've been doing very well. Ducati's video of the Desert Sled had me salivating all over my keyboard. Watching Drake McElroy pull high-speed wheelies through the desert and doing everything I had wanted to see a Scrambler do, it seemed Ducati got this one so very right. After riding it, that seemed to be even more true.

And then we have the newest model… A café racer the likes of which we have seen in kits and customs on the Ducati Scrambler, now available directly from the factory. If we are just talking about the bike, I’m into it. Sure it’s nothing crazy new, but it’s a different style on an awesome platform and relatively affordable for what you get. It’s the video that makes me want to carve my eyes out with a spoon.

The video opens with some shots of vintage trinkets, bowling pins and knickknacks—okay, blatantly hipster shit, but still not terrible. Then cut to some riding shots-- the dude is leaning okay and carrying decent speed, again, not bad. Wait—what? Okay.. he’s in a barber chair. They going to trim up his man bun? Where’s the craft beer? No $12 Imperial Grapefruit IPA? Will they curl his mustache and apply beard oil for him? That’s going to get messed up when he pulls his helmet back on. Oh well, don’t worry, no hair cutting happens.

Back on the bike! Where to now? A used record store, obviously. Don't worry, it's not your ordinary music shop. This is a very cool one with an Ornamental Conifer painted window where you're sure to find only the most obscure albums that none of your friends have heard of. Where else would you pick up the new Dandy Warhols' single that's been playing throughout the video? Alright, I can't even pretend to hate on the Dandies. Last but not least... where can we go that just says "I want to be cool as shit… Like Gosling in Drive, cool." ahh yes—the LA River.

That old Porsche was actually really cool until I saw the X’d out “café racer” headlights on the front, too. But I was very disappointed Ducati’s Racer didn’t follow suit with electrical tape, how else am I supposed to know it’s a REAL cafe racer?!

Joking aside, the bike looks like it rips. Pulling a good wheelie off the line, it’s just the contrived video makes me not want to touch it with a 10-foot pole (maybe an 8-foot pole).

Don’t let a crummy video take away from what all signs are saying will be a great bike. Hopefully we’ll have more to say on this one soon, but until then we hope you enjoy this terrible bit of hipster bait as much as we did.